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CLOSED BODY LANGUAGE

Closed body language is often misunderstood, interpreted mistakenly as defensiveness. Closed behavior is actually a tightening up of the body, closing yourself off physically from either outside or inside influences.

As human beings, we often give each other verbal and non-verbal feedback, in order for us to know how to interact with each other. Emotions, as a point of interest, can never be fully surprised, making the giving of feedback difficult!

Closed gestures are one way that we give non-verbal feedback to others. What exactly are closed gestures then?

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Intro to Closed Gestures

These are a negative type of body language, and are usually a sign that the person is protecting themselves, or they do not want to communicate with you completely or honestly.

There are many signs that come across as closed. They can be anything from curling up into a ball, to bringing your limbs together. An extreme situation can result in you rocking to and fro rhythmically.

True and fake closed behavior really mimic each other closely, the difference between the two being intent and motivations. Also, the most notable difference between the two is in how they are carried out.

What then, are the signs of true closed behavior?

True Closed Behavior

True closed behavior can be any of the following:

• Crossing or folding your arms: There are many levels of tension possible, from tightly folding your arms across your body’s central line, to holding one hand or arm with the other in a relaxed droop.
• Crossing your legs: Several ways exist for this form of closed behavior too, from lightly resting your ankle on your thigh, crossing your legs tightly, to crossing your ankles.
• Looking down or looking away: You may incline your head away, tucking it down, in particular.

Serious reasons for this type of behavior are defensiveness and hiding. When you are threatened, you exhibit closed behavior to protect yourself from attack. And when you have something to hide, you may close off your body so as not to be betrayed by your thoughts.

Less serious reasons are the cold, or when you are relaxing. When you are cold, you huddle inwards to protect as much of your body from the elements. Also, you can fold your arms when relaxed just because this is the most comfortable place for you to put your arms.

We said before that true and fake closed behavior mimic each other. How so?

Fake Closed Behavior

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People tend to want to interact with genuine people. This means that they would rather do business or be friends with real, honest and sincere individuals. When someone is closed, this is a genuine behavior. And as long as you are not pretending to be closed, for whatever reason, then people will see this.

It is easy to fake closed behavior, but it is also easy to spot it. For example, when a person folds their arms, their facial expressions should give you the clear indication that they are hiding something from you. Their words too should give you this information. All these things work together.

If crossing your legs are how you are exhibiting or attempting to exhibit closed behavior, then you will time the crossing too perfectly, and your placement of your legs will also be too precise, your ankles finding the exact same spot on your thigh, for example.

What are some examples of closed behavior?

 Short Examples

When you are confronted by someone, defensiveness is an instinctive first response, especially if you are not a person who does well with confrontation. You fold your arms tightly and pull away from the person attacking you, as a means of protecting yourself from the attack.

When you are hiding the truth about something, crossing your legs is a way to keep yourself from exposing the lie. You might also not look directly at the person you are talking to, especially when they are asking you specifically about the lie. This is seen in interrogation situations especially. When a person is aware that they are lying, or that they might say something that could implicate them, they tend to close themselves off. Also, it is seen in courts, on the witness stand.

These examples of closed behavior are just a few, but they give you an indication of situations that lead to true closed behavior.

An example of a situation where you might exhibit fake closed behavior is where you are in a corporate negotiation. You might not want to give away all the information you have, or show all your cards as it were, and so, in order to keep from disclosing, and in order to appear calm and together, you close off your body language. This is the case especially where the other person is excitable, or where what they have to say, or what they bring to the table, is very exciting.

 Conclusion

As we have seen, there are many reasons for a person to exhibit closed body language. These factors need to be taken into account when reading body language. A striking difference, for example, between true and fake closed body language, is the periods of transition when the body closes.

As we have seen, also, when these transitions are measured and timed, the closed behavior is probably fake.

Interestingly, when someone is being closed with you, there are a few things that you can do to open them up.  Salespeople, for example, will often give you something to hold, or ask for a gesture with your hands to keep you from crossing your arms.

Alternatively, you can mimic their closed behavior until trust or a bond is built. Once this has been established, you simply unfold, and the chances are, they will follow suit. Where they do not follow, simply repeat, working further on building this bond, and then trying it again.

Closed behavior is one of the few behaviors and body languages where you can exercise a measure of control over somebody else.

References

Nigel Nicholson, How Hardwired Is Human Behavior, (July-August 1998)

Steve Tobak, 10 Behaviors of Genuine People, (March 16, 2015)

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