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DOMINANT BODY LANGUAGE

Dominant body language and aggressive body language are quite similar. Where they vary is in the emotional content, however, where dominant body language has markedly less.

Dominant stances generally leave the body open. There are additional aspects too, and the following introduction to this type of body language will give some insight to what these are.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Intro to Domination

Dominant body language is very physical. You may widen your elbows by placing your hands on your hips, stand upright with your chest out and your chin up, and place your legs far apart, all in an attempt to enlarge your body.

You can also heighten your body, which gives you an attack advantage. This can be achieved by standing on a step or placing the other person on a lower seat.

You can also occupy the other person’s territory, this invasion indicating not only dominance, but also control!

True dominant behavior starts as early as the greeting. The following will let you know what are dominant behavior is.

True Dominant Behavior

Greeting sets the tone for a relationship or interaction. People who dominate the greeting will likely dominate the rest of the discourse. You can display dominance in the greeting in the following ways:

• With the handshake, you can either shake with your palm down, or you can use strength, squeezing the other person’s hand. You can also control the handshake by holding the other’s hand longer!
• You may maintain prolonged, unblinking contact with your eyes, which says that you are powerful, or avoiding eye contact, saying in effect that you do not want to look at the other person because you perceive them as beneath you!
• If you speak first, too, chances are you will control the conversation, and also manage the questions!

Disapproving frowns, snarls and sneers are facial expressions of dominance. In men, phallic displays, where the crotch is exposed, are also signs of dominance. Breaking social rules, getting the larger office, flaunting displays of wealth, or belittling others are superiority signals of dominance.

These are all ways to express truly dominant behavior. Is fake dominance possible?

 Fake Dominant Behavior

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

According to a set of studies on the relationship between dominance and attractiveness, it was found that dominant men were found to be more sexually attractive. It should be noted too, however, that domineering and aggressive tendencies were found not to increase attractiveness, in both men and women.

That said, it would be advantageous if we could fake dominance, if only for the purpose of appearing more attractive.

In this regards, fake dominance and learned dominance become interchangeable, where one can be said to be the same as the other.

How can you learn to be more dominant?

You have been introduced previously to true dominant behavior. You can therefore practice doing the following:

• Sustaining eye contact
• Giving firmer handshakes
• Leading conversations by speaking first and controlling the narrative
• Enlarging and heightening your body, and even
• Invading another’s territory

According to Mike Chernovich, learning dominance starts with your state of mind. You need to engage in self-talk, for example, repeating to yourself that “You are done only when I say you’re done!”

Also, according to Mike, you cannot hope to dominate others until you have dominated yourself. Dominance is an inside out, and not an outside in, exercise.

Where you can start to exercise dominance over yourself are the following:

• Forcing yourself to get out of bed when you’d rather snuggle
• Editing your blog even when you lack the motivation
• Instead of being controlled by your emotions, you exercise the control
• Learning to stop when your high intensity training reaches dangerous burn levels
• Avoiding watching porn or getting drunk, when this is all you want to do

So, not only do people get away with what we allow them to, the same goes for ourselves. If we let ourselves off the hook enough times, then we form bad habits. Learn to tell yourself, and believe, that you are done when you say you’re done!

The following are examples of dominance.

 Short Examples

In relationships, dominance is established early on so that when they have a disagreement, fighting and negotiation becomes unnecessary between the two partners. This is because the outcome is usually predetermined, the dominant person wins! For example, in the case of an abusive relationship, where the male has established that he dominates the relationship, every time an argument starts, the female (usually) submits immediately, cowering and conceding before things get out of hand.

In business negotiations too, both parties will want to dominate. But the points always go to the one with the firmer handshake, who maintains eye contact, and who controls the discourse.

Also, when two men are competing for a female’s attention, it is usually the more dominant one that wins. It is the man who appears bigger, whose chest is puffed out, who stands firmly with his legs apart, and who, either by accident or design, shows some phallic display. There is a primal reason for this, but it is not in the ambit of this article to get into the biological details for this behavior.

Dominant behavior can therefore be advantageous.

 Conclusion

Image by Sabine Mondestin from Pixabay

You have a range of options in response to dominance. You can choose simply not to respond, maintaining a friendly demeanor and ignoring the subtle signals.

Also, you may choose to react in kind, by:

• Out-staring them
• Touching them
• Grabbing their elbow and stepping to the side when they perform a power handshake, or
• Speeding up and talking more loudly when they interrupt your speaking

You can also expose them, by enquiring after the use of dominant body language, in an unafraid and almost curious way!

As a final note, it is interesting that dominance is not for the benefit of the species. It exists because it has a net benefit to the individuals, which means that the costs are usually far less than the actual benefits.

There are also various shades of dominance, and understanding where it is good or bad for you in any particular situation will determine how well you integrate. This is something really worth thinking about!

References

Scott Barry Kaufman, the Myth of the Alpha Male, (July 7, 2014)

Mike Cernovich, How to Become A More Dominant Man, (March 14, 2014)

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